Male Bonding
by MeteorSkyline
Summary: Kirk shows Spock what its like to be human. A little male monding is in order.


**So hopefully I don't get bombarded with people telling me how 'inaccurate' or whatever, this story is. This is purely for entertainment purposes. Kinda like an inside joke for Alee. Hope you enjoy! OH. And like 7 people reviewed saying how "offensive" the description was. And it is changed from what it was. And I agree with them, it wasn't very nice. Sorry all =[**

**I DON'T OWN ANYTHING... though I REALLY wish I had Kirk and Spock to myself xDD**

"This, my pointy-eared friend, is human nature at its finest." James T. Kirk said slinging his arm around his half-Vulcan comrade by the name of Spock. The pair stood in the doorway of a dainty karaoke bar that held the intense smells of old peanuts matched with odd assortments of beer and body odor from the _many _residents of Riverside, Iowa. It was well into the evening which meant that most of the people that were there were already well enough drunk. Kirk gleamed at the sight with pride while Spock had no idea how he got here in the first place.

It had something to do with Kirk roping his new _friend _into "embracing" his human side. Something along the lines of "…experiencing the culture and the natural habitats of Earth." Needless to say, a ho-dunk bar in Midwestern America was not exactly what Spock had in mind. But then again, Kirk always had a way with words. A way of making things, Iowa, seem a lot better on paper than in real life.

They approached the bar counter, Spock most definitely wary about his surroundings. The obvious last minute wipe-up of the counter that was still sticky with spilled drinks.

"Why did you bring me here, James?" Spock said more like a demand more than a question. Kirk didn't acknowledge his distaste but instead flagged down the bartender and ordered a round tequila shots.

"Because, this is the side of you're life that you've been missing out on! While you were a kid worrying about school and crap, I was sneaking in here seeing if they would buy my fake ID." He said with a laugh, reminiscing about that night he got in trouble (again) with his step father. He might've been about thirteen or fourteen.

"I fear that I do no understand you're love for this type of place. The music is loud, the smell is not flattering, and there are many health code violations that I can see already." Spock contradicted, pulling his eyebrows together.

"Oh c'mon, Spock. When you say it like that, _of course _everything looks bad." Kirk said taking one of the shot glasses with the golden alcohol in his hand and sliding the other to his right. "Here, have a shot." He said taking the massive gulp like it was apple juice. Spock took the glass in his hand skeptically completely unsure about the drink he'd never had before. He put it to his lips, imitating his friend in the way he'd drunk it; tilting his head back and swallowing it all at one time. It burned his throat, making him hold back his urge to cough.

"Woo!" Kirk cheered for Spock, slapping his back. "Now I can tell Bones I finally made a man out of you."

"I'll have you know, _Kirk,_" He said setting his glass onto the counter top, "I was already a man before this little _adventure._"

"Oh yeah, how." Kirk said motioning for two more shots.

"Well, I read somewhere, that 'to be made a man,' like you stated, it is human nature for the male to have sexual intercourse with the opposite sex."

Kirk quickly put two and two together and realized that by 'opposite sex' he meat Uhura. There was a slight twinge of envy but it was not enough to make him angry at succeeding where Kirk crashed and burned many times before. "Well I'll drink to that," he said instead smirking, holding up the now full shot glass. The toasted and swigged it back.

They did shots more times than Spock would care to share to anyone. So far he'd done a fair job at keeping composure. Unlike his partner in crime who was now a giggling mess running up onto the stage on the right side of the establishment, grabbing the microphone and choosing a song. Spock just looked on in confusion.

"This one is for you, my friend!" He spoke into the mic pointing to Spock from across the bar as the first few notes of _Like a Virgin _began.

The crowd cheered him on as he sung the words and Kirk ate it up like cake. More into the song he got, the more he began to get into the song. _"Like a virginnnnn…WOO! Touched for the very first timmeeee!!" _he sang gyrating his hips and sliding his hand down his torso whilst eyeing a few good looking girls at the table in front. Spock didn't understand Kirk's willingness to act like an intoxicated fool. He also didn't understand what made the crowd cheer for him. And he also didn't understand why the tequila made him feel so good. And yet for some reason, the voice in his head that made him analyze and interpret everything, to find an answer or solution was silenced. He didn't know many things about these humans, but he didn't care.

But wait… why were they now cheering for him to get on stage?


End file.
